I think Christmas is my most sentimental time of year. I'm sure it's that way for most people (who celebrate Christmas). This is my favorite time to look back and old pictures, and take new ones. Last night I took a picture of Samren that was very similar to one I took of him when he was just a little older than Bright is now (well...I guess he was about a year older...just over 2).
It's just amazing how quickly children grow, isn't it? I remember my daddy always telling me that when I was little and I didn't get it. It felt like I would be a kid forever! But here I am almost 6 years into being a mommy and now I get it. My babies are growing up. And I get that 5 years from now I'll look back at them as 5 and 6 year (and 14 month) olds and think how tiny they were in 2006.
Sometimes I hear the rhetorical question from adoptive parents, "Why does it have to be so hard to adopt?" I ask it too. I think most of us do at some point. But in my heart I know that all of the hardness of this journey ends in me NEVER taking my child for granted. I just can't. I worked too hard to get them here. And in Samren's case we worked really hard to KEEP him here (he was so sick as an infant/toddler). No. I will never regret or wish away one moment I have with my children. All of the hours and days and months of waiting for them and missing them won't allow me to.
I look forward to a time when all of the ache in my heart for Bright is a memory. I look forward to next Christmas when I will be missing him no longer (Lord willing). I look forward to having all of my children under one roof...making messes and noise and memories TOGETHER.