Ghana's Shining Stars

A few days ago I met a truly wonderful young girl. I was looking forward to meeting her, as I had heard she was in need of adoption. She is "older," and with older children I think it's important to consider not only their current living situation, but also how well they would do with the transition to a new family, in a new country.


I was immediately drawn to this child. Not only is she beautiful, but she is friendly, and intelligent, and loving. What a bright and shining star she is! She is so wonderful, in fact, that when families travel to pick up their children, this child has gone along for the first few days to help the family communicate with their new children.

J's English is impeccable. Her manners are spot on. I loved the way she grabbed my hand to hold it as we walked to and from some place. I thought to myself, "Whomever adopts this child is going to be TRULY blessed!"

As I spoke with her about her situation, she became sort of quiet. She lives with her mom half the time, and at the group foster home I was visiting the other half of the time. She is in grade 4 at school. She loves her mom. Her dad died, and I could see in her eyes that she is still grieving for that lost. Her dad was not a sperm donor, but a real father in her life. When you look at this situation in a legal sense, it seems that this child would qualify as an "orphan" by U.S. definition. She could legally be adopted and leave this country with a new adoptive family. But is that what is best for HER?

As I dug deeper, I found out that her father has recently passed away. IN THE UNITED STATES. Do you know how hard it is for a Ghanaian to get a visa to the United States? Very hard. The fact that he was in the U.S. signifies his status within the community. This sweet little girl stands out as bright and intelligent because she HAS had lots of opportunities in life. She has gone to the best school in the area. She has received good nutrition and good education and the love of two parents. One of those parents is gone now. And yes, her mom is struggling financially now that dad is gone. But this in itself is not a reason to rip this child away from her mother and everything she knows, even if it's legally possible.

This child. This bright shining star, only needs educational sponsorship. She can stay here in the country that needs her. She can become a difference-maker here in Ghana. She can continue to live a good life, in the place that she was born.

I think too often we Americans see an "orphaned" child and assume the best thing for them is international adoption. We must stop doing that. For some children it would be a tragedy if they were adopted. For some children, adoption is *NOT* the answer. It is my hope that as a community we can shift our thinking a bit. Let us do what we can to PRESERVE families before we go to the last resort--international adoption.

Love,
Anita