Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Trial Run

***Updated to say: I have just seen some of the blog posts that you all have put up about Eric's transplant. I am *SO* humbled. I know it doesn't make sense, but I am so embarressed that I got everybody so excited. I was telling Eric on the way out of the hospital, "It is like buying your tickets for adoption pickup and then being told you can't travel after all." Telling everybody that your not traveling after all is the worst feeling ever.***

Dear Friends and Family,


I am so humbled by your prayers and words of encouragement. This has been such a whirl-wind day. At 9am Eric was called by the Kidney Transplant team to say that he needed to be at the hospital for testing. There were two kidneys and he was 3rd on the list. By 9:45 (after piling 4 kids into the car as fast as I could!) we were all at the hospital. They did the blood testing that would determine if Eric was a match. We were told to go home and wait.

At around 2:30 we got the call that Eric was now "primary"--meaning that he was to get one of the two kidneys. We were to go to his kidney doctor's office for hospital orders and a final physical. We had done some preparation (packing for Eric's stay at the hospital) but it was still very harried as we sent the kids to our neighbor's to spend the night and packed up baby Ryder's things to go along with us.

While at the kidney doctor's office Eric's dialysis team cried happy tears with us. Without sounding conceited, I think we are sort of a favorite. After all, most people on dialysis are old. We come in for clinic every month with 3 or 4 (cute!) kids. LOL! Anyway, our ladies at clinic were so truly happy. We asked the doctor if this was really a go. He said it was. We wouldn't be there if it wasn't a go. Eric would get a kidney tonight.

From the doc's office we headed to the hospital, where there was a room waiting and Eric got checked in. The put in an IV, talked to us about surgery and such, did a bundle of last minute tests on Eric, and we waited. They told us it wasn't a total all clear yet because the kidney wasn't cleared from the cadaver. But that they were treating him as an "all go" because they believed that to be the case. We didn't really worry about it. But we kept waiting. And waiting.

Finally at around 7pm the transplant coordinator called Eric's room phone. While listening to her, he made this face. And I knew. We weren't getting the kidney.

The kidney was found to have been somewhat damaged (in some way) after it was taken from the cadaver. Our kidney surgeon is known to be a picky guy. He wasn't going to put a less than perfect kidney into Eric. About an hour later Eric was discharged from the hospital.

It has been such a long day. In fact, I really thought it was Wednesday. Two days in one! We are so extremely disappointed. But at the same time, there are blessings in this. Before today we didn't know if Eric was #3 or #30 on the list. Before today we probably wouldn't have thought much about taking a weekend trip to visit my parents. Before today we didn't have a clear picture of the process of "the day of transplant."

Now we know that the next kidney could very well be Eric's. We know not to leave Tulsa! And we know what it will be like next time. We regretted how quickly we shuffled the kids off to our neighbor's house. No family prayer. No sentimental goodbyes (just in case). Next time, that will be a priority.

This is going to happen. And we believe it will happen soon. I'll be surprised if Eric doesn't have his kidney before Kendi comes home. We're hoping she will come home on Labor Day Weekend.

Please pray for my hubby's heart. He's very brave and hasn't shed a tear. But I know he is weary of dialysis. I know he is disappointed that this wasn't THE day. We are so lucky to have him.

22 comments:

Jen 9:37 PM  

I am sorry that today was not the day but am so happy to hear that you now know that it is probably sooner than later. After reading your post, it sounds to me like this may have been what was supposed to happen so that you do stay close to home and are prepared for this at any moment so that when his kidney comes, you are ready- physically and mentally.
I always keep Eric in my prayers and will continue to do so...

Jennine

whenpigsfly 9:41 PM  

I am so glad you're my friend!!!!!!!!!!
How cool for God to give you an inside glimpse of how He watches out for us every day. Another surgeon "might have" allowed that kidney to be transplanted, and who knows what all that could have added to Eric's health issues? God let you get thisclose and pulled you back from the edge. You knew you could trust Him and the surgeon as well. Today I think we all know it even better!
Love
Linda

Cora 10:20 PM  

well, it was just good practice anyway I am sure they will find that perfect kidney for him soon.

Cora

In His Dust 10:26 PM  

So, sorry for you both. But, I am also so excited to know he is soooo close! I know you must be too.

You are in my prayers and I added you to our GREAT Sunday school class prayer list. They are awesome prayer warriors! God is taking care of you both!

Amy 10:50 PM  

Oh Anita, I am so sorry for you all. I know you have been waiting for so long and it has been a painful time. I am glad that he is at the top of the list and we'll be praying his time comes soon!

Love you,
Fabu

Laurel 12:02 AM  

Soooo... sorry! But, glad that you know he is right up there at the top of the list.

How fun to think that he may be ready to really PLAY with the kids when Kendi comes home. What a celebration that will be!

Laurel :)

Daniel, Carrie, Carson & Cade 12:16 AM  

please tell Dizzy all his pride facebook friends are praying and thinking of him. I posted he was getting his transplant and got a lot of old friends responding saying they were praying! Hang in there...god's time, not our time :)

Adoption Advocates International 5:38 AM  

oh darn it....but I hope it will be your turn very very very soon. Hang in there.

Andrea 6:18 AM  

I am so sorry that this wasn't the day. How disappointing. How beautiful that you see the process though and are ready for when the time does come! Prayers for you all.

Ericka 6:24 AM  

Oh Anita, SOOOOOOOOOOOO sorry here. I can't imagine the rollercoaster of a day and emotions.
Try to take it easy today.
Hugs,
Ericka

Renee 6:35 AM  

Oh Anita I am so sorry! We all just love you and your family so much. You all show so much grace in your lives. We are praying Eric gets his kidney soon.

Love you!

Jena 6:52 AM  

I will continue to be praying for you guys!

Deborah 10:33 AM  

I am so blessed that you are my friend, adoption coordinator, adviser, shoulder to cry on, cheer leader...you and your family are in my prayers in such a special way today. I can't imagine the pain, and your faith is beyond encouraging to me. My disappointments are so small compared to the last 24 hours for you and Eric.
You are on my heart today. I'm praying for a double miracle!!!

Momto14 10:55 AM  

Oh no. I bet that you are feeling heartbroken- but wow! It CAN HAPPEN and DOES HAPPEN- that is SO cool. I am so excited at the possibility of it happening again for you all soon with the perfect kidney. :)
Love you girl!
Sarah

We are Grateful!!! 12:37 PM  

Please DON'T be embarrassed. You put yourself "out-there" so we could be praying. The answer wasn't what you (or we) wanted, for now, but the prayers are still there.
You both, are warriors in my book. :) Tami

FullPlateMom 1:25 PM  

Prayers for your hubbie. I'm praying that his disappointment gives way to hope very quickly. God did give you a glimpse of all the good things that are right around the corner!

ManyBlessings 2:44 PM  

Don't be embarrassed. It was an honor to pray for you then, and it will be an honor to pray when his time DOES come!

Terynn 3:56 PM  

Anita:

What a roller coaster of activity and emotions. I think you and Eric are handling this admirably and to God's glory!

Praying for God's time line to move quickly, so that Eric can be finished with dialysis fo' evah!! :)

Awo 6:31 PM  

Wow - What an amazing whirlwind of activity and emotions! You're right that this "practice run" will help to prepare you for the real thing. I will pray that it comes soon, and will pray for Eric and all of you.
Awo

Amy 8:14 PM  

I am praying for your husband and your family. Love, Amy

Calico Sky 7:06 AM  

I'm just so sorry. I'll be praying for you all!

Christina 9:31 AM  

Oh how disappointing!! But I'm so glad you can see the silver lining in your long day. And I'll be praying that it happens for real very very soon.