Wednesday, December 20, 2006

I Can Breathe Again

Deep exhale....

Waking up this morning was comparible to waking up on Christmas morning as a 6 year old. You know what I'm talking about. You wake up way earlier than normal but there is no chance of going back to sleep because there is just too much joy in your heart! When I woke up this morning I felt like I could breath again. I felt peace I haven't felt in weeks with regard to our adoption plans. Everything just feels right again.

Yesterday my mom asked me if I was in the Christmas spirit yet. I told her "not yet" but was thinking that there would be no Christmas spirit for me this year--my heart was too broken over the loss of Bright. But guess what? Yep--this morning I woke up with HUGE Christmas spirit! Bring on the music and the baking and wrapping and packing! The only thing worse than waiting through Christmas for a child that isn't home yet is NOT waiting through Christmas for a child that isn't home yet! I have my Bright to wait for! Praise God!!!

I also have a wonderful Christmas gift to look forward to (as I've mentioned before). I have an e-friend that's leaving for Ghana today and has said he will get as many pics as possible of Bright when he visits Eugemot over the holiday. Yesterday this knowledge was TORTURE for me--the thought of getting those pictures after losing him--but today it is just another source of pure JOY!

Merry, merry Christmas everybody!